President Rob remembers...?

Whatever happened to Les Rallyes des pas des Dittons? A forgotten institution! (More likely now an institution situated in the depths of the Surrey countryside full of ex Rallye inmates wishing to be forgotten). Anyway for those of you not understanding the plot so far let me explain that the ever-so-French title was that of the infamous Foot Rallies.

How was this phenomenon conceived? you may well ask. Once upon a Monday morning, while, as you did in those halcyon days, working out of Chairperson Smith's office, to be later known as 'le bureau', the conversation went something like this:

Arthur: Sorry I couldn't make Saturday, (The club had hosted an event to raise money for Tadworth). How did it go?

Smith: Excellent, £150 raised.

Arthur (completely forgot it was pre-tea & fag time on this early Monday morning). That was p***-poor.

Smith: Well you come up with a better idea then!

Arthur: Ok, We'll have a Foot Rally.

Smith: What the hell's a foot rally?

Arthur: Don't know yet!

With that idea sown, we both went off with the respective backs of our fag packets, drafted ideas, met the following Sunday in the Bell at Godstone, wrote the Regulations and there we had it! – 'Le Premier Rallye des pas des Dittons'.

It involved two people teaming up as a 'crew', parting with an Entry Fee, dressing up in the most outrageous gear imaginable, and going from pub to pub attempting the most bizarre tests. All of this was timed and penalties applied, including on the spot fines (which could be turned into bribes!). Oh yes! 'Drink' was involved as well and this proved to be the marketing agent! Now with the concept in place all we needed was an infrastructure. Thames & Long Ditton were chosen to host this extravaganza, not for any historic or special architectural interest, you understand, but simply there being a plethora of drinking establishments! - 15 in total and all in a square mile. However, we only ever used 14, as we did not wish this prestigious event to be labelled a 'pub crawl!'

Next came locating suitable Start/Finish and Scrutineering,(yes, Scrutineering) venues, planning the route, the special stages and tests, and the cajoling of Publicans. All this was done without pain and with relevant ease by Smith and yours truly, or at least as far as we can remember! With this done a permit had to be obtained from the MSA. With our contacts this should not prove a problem! – and true enough it didn't – a waiver was immediately granted without reservation!

At this point we looked at the financial implications, something the cynics amongst you will find hard to credit, (No, I don't like that word – try believe – Ed), that Smith/Arthur hadn't worked out the event was going to need backing. It was at this juncture we had to seek sponsorship for trophies, awards, title rights to the various special stage tests, hotel packages for our friends from afar, printing, advertising, ale to be consumed en-route, etc. etc. This is where we mustered our 'expertise' and produced our 'filofaxes'. The conversation went along the lines of:

Smith: You take A to M, I'll do N to W and Y & Z

Arthur: What about X

Smith: Trust me, Xenogamy is not financially strong enough for this yet!

Anyway as a result of our phone calls we were bombarded with all sorts of goodies from our friends in the Industry, who amazingly enough have remained as such. I worked on obtaining the 'perpetual' trophies while Grinsted was dispatched to

Challenge Trophies to obtain the necessary replicas. When he enquired as to what budget he had we chorused – None! He discovered that engravers make mistakes and we ended up with a huge box full of 'tat', which we immediately endeared to.

Competitors were also expected to obtain sponsorship for taking part and these monies went straight into the kitty. There obviously had to be incentives which came in the form, of a trip for two to New York; a car plus five across the Channel: weekend breaks in country hotels etc. In other words if you came up with the most sponsorship as either a crew or as an individual you won a valuable prize. Other such chattels, considered too good to merely be given as an award, were auctioned after the event, when people were at their most 'relaxed'. A video of the event had been commissioned, a celebrity, (Jeremy Beadle), to start the rally had been found, all the stewards, officials, marshals and the like had been identified, timing and other equipment sourced. We even had a Sinclair C5 as course car. All that remained was to sit back and wait for the entries to flood in! It was at this point the following discussion ensued:

Arthur: It's looking good. How many entries do you suppose we'll get?

Smith: Mmm..........How much money do you think we'll realistically raise?

Arthur: Mmmm.......Fancy another beer!

In truth neither of us had a clue but we needn't have been concerned as in came the entries and at the end of the day Le Premier Rallye des pas des Dittons raised £4500 for the kids at Tadworth. It had all been worthwhile and we turned our attentions on Le Deuxieme......

Over the next few years the event inevitably gained World Championship status and further expertise was sought in the form of Garçon Pilote (Dave Walton), whose knowledge of Franglais was to prove invaluable! and Henry Richardson, who in the past had been, let us say, one of the more imaginative competitors – I'm especially thinking of the Sedan chair containing the blow-up doll! The event was now 'THE' event of the year to do and be seen at and attracted motorsport luminaries from all over, (we even had one from Australia). In its seven years it raised a total of £52000 so why did it stop? Like so many successful events it lacked an organisational interest outside of those who created, developed and nurtured it.

I am constantly being asked, "What happened to the Foot Rally" or more poignantly "When are you doing another Foot Rally", so I know there is very much a market out there wanting this event to happen again.

Now it has been explained to you how simple it was to achieve it's now down to you.

Think what this can mean to those Tadworth kids.